Being
a positive person in cynical world is not easy! Everything from news stories to
entertainment works to bring you down. Besides, trying to be up-beat around
your grouchy family and friends really irritates them (though I admit to
secretly enjoying their discomfort!). This has got me thinking out loud about
why more people are not as happy or as satisfied with their lives as they
should be. I recently completed a 5-minute exercise that just may help!
First,
I believe the reason we do not feel as good about ourselves as we should is all
based on messages we receive from advertising, media and the entertainment
industry. Advertisers know that nothing works like envy! In other words, if you
do not drive a certain car, wear certain clothes, look a certain way, have a
certain life style, drink a certain beer, etc. then somehow you are “less
than”. The way to become “better than”, therefore, is to use or buy that
particular product or live a certain way. I call this “the Big Lie”. You see
advertisers and the media know that everyone has a soft spot in our armor and
they exploit that. The result is we spend time, energy, and money chasing
something that really does not exist. Seriously, does anyone understand a perfume or cologne commercial?!
Truly
we live in an unencouraging world. In fact, leadership expert and author John
Maxwell often states that one of the primary jobs of leaders is to encourage
others. In light of John’s great advice, I want to lead you by encouraging you
to take 5 Minutes to encourage YOURSELF. Adopting a powerful exercise from Jim
Loehr’s grate book, The Only Way to Win,
I want you to take 5 minutes to think about yourself. I know that sounds weird
in that most people rarely do so. Regardless, I want you to take 5 minutes to
think and then write about YOUR BEST
SELF. In other words, list those things about yourself that you are most proud
of in terms of:
- Accomplishments
- Character Strengths
- Values
- Relationships
- Skills
- Abilities
- Attempts
- Challenges You Overcome
- What You Have Built
- What You Still Want to DO!
The
only rule is that you cannot stop until you use the entire 5 minutes (or 10 if
you are feeling particularly generous about yourself!). I did this very
exercise this week and it was incredibly powerful in that just like everyone
else, I have times of self-doubt. The problem becomes when we dwell on the
negatives, it diminishes are effectiveness in work and life. Confidence (as
opposed to arrogance) is an impact multiplier!
I will
also grant you that doing this was not as easy as it sounds because we live in
a world that does easily let us feel good about ourselves. But here’s the
thing, you need to stop second guessing your own worth and value. You need to
listen to YOUR BEST SELF more than the
Itty Bitty Critical Committee that often lives in your head! If you still find
it difficult to complete this exercise, then contact me and let’s see if I can
help.
As always if I can help you and the
people you associate with Get Better, Be Ready and LEAD OUT LOUD, I would
invite you to email me or to visit my website below and see if any of the
training or coaching experiences I offer can provide an impact! Also, as a
bonus, if you go to my Out Loud Strategies website (www.outloudinc.com) and enter your contact information, I will
send you a FREE guide to establishing a mentoring initiative program in your
organization! Such an initiative would be critical to add value to your
organization!
Yours in Leadership,
Bill Faulkner
Principal Consultant –
Out Loud Strategies
Independent Coach,
Speaker, and Trainer with the John Maxwell Team TM
Email = bill@outloudinc.com
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