Any kind of substantial life
change, whether it be changing careers or your leadership approach, requires
that you change yourself! That is a pretty dramatic statement to make but if
you think about it, its truth lies in the fact that what got you here may not be sufficient to get you there!
In my role of training and
coaching established leaders and professionals, that is perhaps the toughest
hurdle to overcome, mainly because there is no clear road map of how to do so.
This has me thinking out loud that whereas I cannot offer guidance on exactly
what to do (because each situation is uniquely different), I could share some
thoughts of how to at least go about
doing it!
Pulling heavily from Herminia
Ibarra’s great book, Working Identity,
making a significant life change often starts with a simple, but incredibly
compelling idea, that at some point in our life, we reach a point where we
want to be somewhere else. We know we are capable of being and doing more, but
we are not sure what to do or how to start. To hopefully be of service, I will
share 9 of her strategies that may help move your forward. In Part I, I will
share 4 and finish next time with 5 more.
Strategy #1 – ACT Your Way into Change
Leadership expert John
Maxwell often shares it is easier to act your way into a feeling versus waiting
until you feel like taking action. The same holds true when you are seeking to
change a life path. Start experimenting with new roles, new leadership approaches,
etc. and see what you gain from that. Trust me, we are always getting feedback
about our work, leadership, ambitions, etc., we just do not always pay much
attention to it! If you just focus on thinking about what you want to do
or be, you will never create the movement you want since the only feedback
mechanism is you. As a great colleague once told me, “just jump in the deep end
of the pool!” I am pretty sure he was talking about my dating life versus how
to enter a swimming pool!
Strategy #2 – Quit Trying to “Find Yourself”
I get a kick when I hear young
people tell me that they want to take a gap year to “find myself”. Seriously,
you’re right there! Just look in the mirror and I guarantee you will be the
only one looking back at you! Dr. Ibarra proposes that we are comprised of many
possible “selves”. We have our professional self, personal self, friend self,
etc. As shared above, taking some kind of trial and error actions allows us to
differentiate between what we really
want versus what we think we want. I
can attest to value of this strategy directly. By acting on my idea I thought wanted to be a freelance
consultant (one possible self), I learned what I really wanted was to do such work but back in a higher education
setting (my true self!). When we fail to
act, we never make progress from the conceptual self to our actual self.
Strategy #3 – Allow Yourself a Transition Period
When making a major life
change, it may be efficient but unwise to just “rip off the bandage”! I think
that is why so many leadership development initiatives fail because the self or
other imposed expectation is that we immediately change course. The problem with
doing so is that we have not taking the time to get ourselves (and certainly
our teams) time to adjust to this new way of operating. Such quick and dramatic
changes become so overwhelming that the shock to the system causes us to retreat
back to the safety of doing things the old, albeit ineffective ways. Whether it
be a career change or a leadership transition, give yourself time to hold on to
what you know still works well while you are letting go to gain something new. Ease
into a new “self” gradually but purposefully. I always share that is ALWAYS better
to be running to something versus running away from something.
Strategy #4 – Avoid the Dramatic Gesture
As you can tell from above,
Dr. Ibarra recommends earning “small wins or changes” as opposed to making a
dramatic life change in the blink of an eye. Such gestures may work well in the
movies but not so much in real life. Small steps or experiments can and often
do lead to big changes. Take on a project at work or pro bono for a non-profit
just to see if the career change or role you are contemplating still holds the
same appeal when you are actually doing it. If a small change in your
leadership behavior works out well, then increase your efforts in a steady but
progressing manner. As Real Estate and leadership author Gary Keller shares, “success
is sequential, not simultaneous.”
I get it, when you are not
getting the results you want or if it seems like “the grass is greener on the
other side of the hill”, just remember you still have to do the hard work that
got you over the first hill to
the grassy field you are presently rolling in! If it is now not as appealing as
it once was, that is perfectly fine. You should want to be the kind of person who wants to do and be more, just
remember that there were no short cuts that got you here; thus, there will not
be any that will get you there! The good news is that since you are wiser and experienced,
it may not take quite as long!
If any of this has resonated
with you, then take some action on it. Create a checklist or strategy journal
that contains action steps you can take in the near future that will move you
to your next self. It is OK and even advisable to reflect on these strategies,
but make sure you calendar specific and actionable steps you can take on each
one to be completed no later than 30 days from the date of your reading. I will
present the other strategies next time so stay tuned!
As always if I can
help you and the people you associate with Get Better, Be
Ready and LEAD OUT LOUD, I invite you to visit my website below and see if any
of the training or coaching experiences I offer can provide an impact.
If you want to know more
about leading with intention, I would direct you to Leading Out
Loud: Strategies for Raising Your Leadership Voice! available on
Amazon.com. I would also be happy to share the full NEXT LEVEL LEADERS training
resources with you or your organization or personally coach you through the
process. Please feel free to contact me for a no obligation inquiry.
Yours in leadership,
Bill Faulkner
Email
= bill@outloudinc.com
Visit our website at: www.outloudinc.com
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John Maxwell Team, please visit
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